I figured you'd say that. [ a false sigh, clearly joking still. ] It's informative in the end. If you want to, we can head over and buy them.
[ but they're really getting pigblocked from cursed treats huh. they're more alarmed that it just BARRELS INTO JONAS THOUGH? HELLO? ]
Jonas!?
[ oh but a mem. they're a bit... distracted by it, but as the memory dies down they'll check on him first and foremost. even as they both remain stuck in a damned barrier. ] Are you alright? ..What was that?
[ PIG. he's a little alarmed once the pig skedaddles and even moreso when he sees his own memory playing out for the two of them. give him a second to blink rapidly in surprise. ]
I'm fine, I'm fine. [ he thinks? he sort of pats himself down as if checking he's still in one piece. ] ...that was the island. It's where Alex and I were before coming here.
[ It's pretty disorientating. they rest a hand carefully on his arm, making sure he's steady and watches him pat himself down. good...? is he sure..? well, they're a bit relieved but there's concern there for other reasons now. ]
I see... it's.. the one with the Ghosts, right? [ they say this quietly, a bit familiar by now. if because they have had a run in with Alex. they're choosing their words carefully though. ]
Yeah. Those guys. [ dryly. kind of agitated. ] ...I don't know if Alex told you much about that when she talked to you about the loops we went through.
She did not. Neither of you really did... it was only just the concept of loops. [ which they say quietly, considering before. ] ...Not until I saw them in Alex's memory.
[ they shake their head at that, before giving him a look of understanding. after all from what they've seen... it must be incredibly difficult to approach. they don't blame either of them for that. they think about how the two of them had to watch their friend die over... and over. and over. trying to skip to the next part in that memory. ]
No, it looked... [ that worry flickers, before they start to consider what they saw. carefully, they raise a hand and very gently touch his arm. and of course he's here. ]
...At the time, Alex had said it was one of the longest times you'd been possessed yet that night. [ "...and his soul's as quiet as an empty church." ] You said it felt like you ate a tree.
[ yeah, murdergame's been fun for that reason. jonas is frowning a little, but he doesn't push them away or shy away from the touch. he remembers exactly what they're mentioning, of course. maybe not the entire thing, but enough. ]
...yeah. They got better and better about taking control after a while whether we wanted them to or not. [ he makes a face at that. ] Everything about it just felt. Wrong? Like...kind of like the feeling of drowning in your own body. The pressure of something else being there and pulling you down before you can even react and save yourself.
[ :pensive: but when he doesn't push or shy away from their hand, their hand lowers to gingerly grip at his wrist. not really holding his hand, but as close as they can get. of course, the grip is loose, uncertain if this was fine- he can shake it off very easily. ]
...I had thought being infected by the Gnos was terrible, it felt like your mind was being slowly pulled apart. The longer it was, it felt like.. you were merging into something bigger. You were starting to lose what made you... you. [ they peer up at him, a glow of concern still on their expression. ] It doesn't compare to what you guys experienced. The thought of.. being there, but not, getting quieter and quieter...
It sounds terrifying. [ they whisper that. because it does. it sounds like being shut in a dark room. even if they were infected as Gnosia, they would just quickly finish the loop and move on to escape from it. but for Jonas and Alex-- if they had been possessed permanently... how do you go back from that? it's neither here nor there but... it hurts to think that Jonas and Alex both could have lost themselves entirely. ]
[ as usual, he does not shake it off. this is just how things are now.
when they say it back to him, he kind of goes "oh. yeah, that sounds pretty bad, huh?" like...reasonably, yes, it's bad and he knows it's bad but both alex and jonas don't always talk about how the island went and the things they saw or felt. it's still something he's coming to terms with, sometimes, and there are things he doesn't fully remember himself until someone else says it. ]
...it was kind of scary to think of how long they managed to do it. They got really good at possessing Clarissa, this other girl we know. Sometimes they'd find Alex. Sometimes it was Ren. And usually the end results weren't great and we'd have to loop over and over to figure out how to get them back.
[ theres more to it than that, but jonas himself doesn't know. this is just his basic understanding of what happened. ]
Alex always knew when the loops happened. I didn't start realizing it until later in the night, and even then there wasn't much I could do about it.
Alex mentioned she had a lot of... anger. That the Ghosts seemed pretty angry too. She thinks maybe that made it easier to possess her... [ which, Setsu thinks that it makes sense. with similar emotions, it would be easier to resonate, wouldn't it? and for those quieter... mm. ] I do remember you saying it before. But seeing it from her point of view as well...
[ well, if he won't shake it off, they'll hold onto his hand now. lightly though, though it squeezes a little at his words. cause yeah, it's actually pretty bad. but... Setsu knows everyone deals with things differently. after all, with Setsu in their own situation, the way they managed to-- which is when a memory plays.
as a note, player's name should be "takashi" rather than kaio. also the way i keep changing my mem plans because of things help. plans for more later ig. discussions happen during this mem as well but they're cut out because of TIME however you saw me play a bit of gnosia so you know how those discussions generally go. ]
Yeah, that sounds about right. The ghosts were probably having an easier time settling in to something familiar. If someone wasn't fighting them, why would they have to leave? [ but he frowns a little. ] ...she probably had a more clear picture of everything.
[ so yeah. they can hold on while this memory goes and jonas blinks in surprise as he registers everything going on. including captain jonas? which. okay, weird, but he will not ask.
instead...once the memory fades, he's turning to face them again. ]
...so first of all, that feels kind of shitty to be so close to not looping again only for a technicality to screw it up. Secondly, your captain seems like kind of an asshole. And lastly...can the Gnosia really infect someone who isn't really...y'know. Alive?
...I should've known better, admittedly. The loops wouldn't stop just like that... [ they grip at one of their arms at that. though, the mention of the captain gets a quiet chuckle ] He's... definitely vexing.
[ captain jonas SURE IS A CHARACTER. ]
Well, considering the body of an AI can get infected, as well as someone not at all human like a beluga whale... as long as they are capable of having a mind of their own, it's possible.
I don't think you can blame yourself for feeling a little hopeful that something as draining as your loops finally stopped. [ but...there's a frown again. ] So if that's possible then...did that mean the captain was purposefully hiding that the doll was infected? Why? What was she to him?
I guess so... [ there's something particularly numbing about having some hope and then having it snatched away. ] Even so, it was nice to consider the future for once..
[ because that was the first time they had done it since entering the loops. and here, they've been able to think about it more. with jonas. with alex. ]
In that particular loop, no he wouldn't have known. Unless they both happen to be Gnosia, that would be the only way I think, but in general loops, he would not think it to be possible. [ he's admittedly kinda stupid. ] He worships her. She has extremely similar qualities to someone he once loved and lost.
...the future's always worth considering, even if you don't know when that future will come. [ he's kind of a hypocrite for saying this, but setsu doesn't have to know that. instead, he focuses on everything else. ]
I think I can understand latching onto something that feels familiar, but it's still a little creepy when you put it that way. It's not a real thing when it's like that.
... [ their lips part, as if to say something about that but... they close their mouth, and seem to decide against saying it. it's probably best that way. though how dare you, let setsu know that. ]
It is a bit unsettling, I can agree with you on that. I've never quite understood it myself.
[ but as a tweat on this exhausting week, another mem can play. ]
[ FISHING? he watches this for a while, blinking rapidly in confusion about fishing before the memory fades again. ]
...as much as I hate the way you were put into cold sleep after all of that, it's...a good thing your friend knew when to give you a break and take you to do something fun. Like a nice memory before the last part of that loop.
[ FISHING!! there's a wistful look in their eye, a bit distracted by the memory until they look over to him. even now, they do not seem upset or bothered by that decision. ]
It's a sensible decision. By avoiding the strategic Gnosia discussions, we cannot exactly be trusted. For all they knew... we could be the infected ones. It was the safest decision to cold sleep us. [ so, they don't blame them, and.. as he says ] ...It was fun. It was a good memory to make. I've been trying to keep it in mind, whenever things start to get hard.
[ aka when is probably a good time to have a break.... ]
Yeah I get it's a strategy, but...I don't know. Wouldn't it have also made sense to have a discussion with you again before that? I guess maybe there just wasn't enough time before you had to put someone to sleep. [ still. he does not really seem impressed. ]
I think it's a good idea to hold on to as many good memories as you can for times like these. And for other tough decisions. Even if it didn't end exactly the way you wanted, there was still good in it. That counts for something.
There wouldn't have been much time, no. By the time discussions end, it's night and the warp happens not long after. [ that's fair, they really were just composed about that decision and even now they are. ]
It does... it does count for something. [ it's funny how content they seem to be in the moment, it wasn't a terrible memory to play, it's a wistful thought. but the idea of making many good memories... they like being able to. something to take back with them, haha... ]
Still...even a little extra time. What if something happened that you couldn't actually get to the discussion? They could just throw you out like that?
[ stupid. ]
I know other people might not think so, but...that's all I think about it. [ he shrugs about it. and with that, there is also another memory until 2:01:47. ]
If it was something out of our control, then... maybe. But they found us, more or less, goofing off and that was that.
[ you know, once upon a time they may have worded this a bit differently, but clearly they've been hanging around Alex and Jonas so much they're kinda taking up a bit of the way they talk. i think it's a lil funny.
but ah, a memory... it's always such a strange thing. they aren't sure if they'll ever get used to it but... as soon as the memory ends, they aren't really pausing to mull over it ]
She's right, you know. You really are a good guy. [ this one is a good bean ]
[ he kind of smiles in spite of himself because he can pick up on the lil shift in dialect. the situation itself isn't funny at all, but still. ]
Okay, but still.
[ it's more of a token argument than anything. but there's a memory, then, and he goes quiet until it finishes doing its thing. no more barrier. go away. but he pauses, too, while they speak. ]
...it's still a work in progress, and I know that. [ which is as close as he'll get to saying he can kind of believe that most of the time but not always. ]
[ there's only a small smile in response to his slight argument. however, they don't say any more on it. they know there's quite a lot about their experience that wouldn't be wholly agreed upon from others.
but the barrier is gone (whoopee.) they are free. and they glance up, observing him as he answers and... Setsu looks on thoughtfully. ]
Mmm.. the Jonas I have gotten to know, I do like that person. I like who I've seen. [ and no matter his past, they would accept that as well. after all, haven't they done the same for them? despite everything they've done... good and bad, he's still here. ]
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[ but they're really getting pigblocked from cursed treats huh. they're more alarmed that it just BARRELS INTO JONAS THOUGH? HELLO? ]
Jonas!?
[ oh but a mem. they're a bit... distracted by it, but as the memory dies down they'll check on him first and foremost. even as they both remain stuck in a damned barrier. ] Are you alright? ..What was that?
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I'm fine, I'm fine. [ he thinks? he sort of pats himself down as if checking he's still in one piece. ] ...that was the island. It's where Alex and I were before coming here.
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I see... it's.. the one with the Ghosts, right? [ they say this quietly, a bit familiar by now. if because they have had a run in with Alex. they're choosing their words carefully though. ]
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[ ... ] I.. saw them possessing you.
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The...whole night was pretty intense for both of us. We haven't really talked about it with anybody. Barely with each other, even.
[ but...he is now trying to remember which time that might've been. and he figures maybe he should just ask. ]
...which time? They managed to do it a few times to a few of us.
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No, it looked... [ that worry flickers, before they start to consider what they saw. carefully, they raise a hand and very gently touch his arm. and of course he's here. ]
...At the time, Alex had said it was one of the longest times you'd been possessed yet that night. [ "...and his soul's as quiet as an empty church." ] You said it felt like you ate a tree.
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...yeah. They got better and better about taking control after a while whether we wanted them to or not. [ he makes a face at that. ] Everything about it just felt. Wrong? Like...kind of like the feeling of drowning in your own body. The pressure of something else being there and pulling you down before you can even react and save yourself.
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...I had thought being infected by the Gnos was terrible, it felt like your mind was being slowly pulled apart. The longer it was, it felt like.. you were merging into something bigger. You were starting to lose what made you... you. [ they peer up at him, a glow of concern still on their expression. ] It doesn't compare to what you guys experienced. The thought of.. being there, but not, getting quieter and quieter...
It sounds terrifying. [ they whisper that. because it does. it sounds like being shut in a dark room. even if they were infected as Gnosia, they would just quickly finish the loop and move on to escape from it. but for Jonas and Alex-- if they had been possessed permanently... how do you go back from that? it's neither here nor there but... it hurts to think that Jonas and Alex both could have lost themselves entirely. ]
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when they say it back to him, he kind of goes "oh. yeah, that sounds pretty bad, huh?" like...reasonably, yes, it's bad and he knows it's bad but both alex and jonas don't always talk about how the island went and the things they saw or felt. it's still something he's coming to terms with, sometimes, and there are things he doesn't fully remember himself until someone else says it. ]
...it was kind of scary to think of how long they managed to do it. They got really good at possessing Clarissa, this other girl we know. Sometimes they'd find Alex. Sometimes it was Ren. And usually the end results weren't great and we'd have to loop over and over to figure out how to get them back.
[ theres more to it than that, but jonas himself doesn't know. this is just his basic understanding of what happened. ]
Alex always knew when the loops happened. I didn't start realizing it until later in the night, and even then there wasn't much I could do about it.
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[ well, if he won't shake it off, they'll hold onto his hand now. lightly though, though it squeezes a little at his words. cause yeah, it's actually pretty bad. but... Setsu knows everyone deals with things differently. after all, with Setsu in their own situation, the way they managed to-- which is when a memory plays.
as a note, player's name should be "takashi" rather than kaio. also the way i keep changing my mem plans because of things help. plans for more later ig. discussions happen during this mem as well but they're cut out because of TIME however you saw me play a bit of gnosia so you know how those discussions generally go. ]
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[ so yeah. they can hold on while this memory goes and jonas blinks in surprise as he registers everything going on. including captain jonas? which. okay, weird, but he will not ask.
instead...once the memory fades, he's turning to face them again. ]
...so first of all, that feels kind of shitty to be so close to not looping again only for a technicality to screw it up. Secondly, your captain seems like kind of an asshole. And lastly...can the Gnosia really infect someone who isn't really...y'know. Alive?
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...I should've known better, admittedly. The loops wouldn't stop just like that... [ they grip at one of their arms at that. though, the mention of the captain gets a quiet chuckle ] He's... definitely vexing.
[ captain jonas SURE IS A CHARACTER. ]
Well, considering the body of an AI can get infected, as well as someone not at all human like a beluga whale... as long as they are capable of having a mind of their own, it's possible.
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[ because that was the first time they had done it since entering the loops. and here, they've been able to think about it more. with jonas. with alex. ]
In that particular loop, no he wouldn't have known. Unless they both happen to be Gnosia, that would be the only way I think, but in general loops, he would not think it to be possible. [ he's admittedly kinda stupid. ] He worships her. She has extremely similar qualities to someone he once loved and lost.
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I think I can understand latching onto something that feels familiar, but it's still a little creepy when you put it that way. It's not a real thing when it's like that.
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It is a bit unsettling, I can agree with you on that. I've never quite understood it myself.
[ but as a tweat on this exhausting week, another mem can play. ]
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...as much as I hate the way you were put into cold sleep after all of that, it's...a good thing your friend knew when to give you a break and take you to do something fun. Like a nice memory before the last part of that loop.
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It's a sensible decision. By avoiding the strategic Gnosia discussions, we cannot exactly be trusted. For all they knew... we could be the infected ones. It was the safest decision to cold sleep us. [ so, they don't blame them, and.. as he says ] ...It was fun. It was a good memory to make. I've been trying to keep it in mind, whenever things start to get hard.
[ aka when is probably a good time to have a break.... ]
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I think it's a good idea to hold on to as many good memories as you can for times like these. And for other tough decisions. Even if it didn't end exactly the way you wanted, there was still good in it. That counts for something.
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It does... it does count for something. [ it's funny how content they seem to be in the moment, it wasn't a terrible memory to play, it's a wistful thought. but the idea of making many good memories... they like being able to. something to take back with them, haha... ]
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[ stupid. ]
I know other people might not think so, but...that's all I think about it. [ he shrugs about it. and with that, there is also another memory until 2:01:47. ]
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[ you know, once upon a time they may have worded this a bit differently, but clearly they've been hanging around Alex and Jonas so much they're kinda taking up a bit of the way they talk. i think it's a lil funny.
but ah, a memory... it's always such a strange thing. they aren't sure if they'll ever get used to it but... as soon as the memory ends, they aren't really pausing to mull over it ]
She's right, you know. You really are a good guy. [ this one is a good bean ]
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Okay, but still.
[ it's more of a token argument than anything. but there's a memory, then, and he goes quiet until it finishes doing its thing. no more barrier. go away. but he pauses, too, while they speak. ]
...it's still a work in progress, and I know that. [ which is as close as he'll get to saying he can kind of believe that most of the time but not always. ]
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but the barrier is gone (whoopee.) they are free. and they glance up, observing him as he answers and... Setsu looks on thoughtfully. ]
Mmm.. the Jonas I have gotten to know, I do like that person. I like who I've seen. [ and no matter his past, they would accept that as well. after all, haven't they done the same for them? despite everything they've done... good and bad, he's still here. ]
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