[ he's just hanging out with his cigarette, but his emotions blip to something a little softer when they appear next to him. there's still stress there, for him, but he frowns softly when they speak. ]
But it's another instance of someone who probably didn't want to do it. Feels like a cheap victory, a little? [ it's complicated is what it is, because he'd liked buzen enough. ]
[ after all of that, they aren't surprised by the stress coming from him. their own softening a little in reply. ]
Mmm... I think if it was because of any of the reasons that were mentioned, maybe it wouldn't feel this way. [ hearing libby say it wasn't any of those... it really is complicated. they lean a little to the side to plop their head against him, glancing down with a frown. tired. ] If it had been anyone else too, I just...
[ a quiet, frustrated noise. of course that distant hurt comes through, because they did like Buzen. some of their recent decisions was made because of his advice and now he's just... gone. first Rin, now Buzen. it's just been a rough back to back. ]
[ he doesn't seem to mind them leaning against him, even if he's busy staring out into the cold, dark annoying world. he's busy trying to wrestle his feelings back in so he can fixate on what's left, which is a whole messy situation. ]
It was a bad combination of stuff. It was a combination of someone else that was liked and a reason only Libby and maybe Buzen really know. It's hard to be mad when it was obvious she didn't mean for it to be as bad.
But it's also hard not to tell people they can still be upset.
It might've been. But I don't know if kindness was the thing on anybody's mind after all of the events of today. [ jonas is one of the people who's not sure if he feels bad for her or not, really. if only because of all of the collateral damage left behind and for reasons that may or may not have made more sense than what they'd guessed they were. ] I don't get it. But maybe we're not the ones who're supposed to.
[ true. he seems to agree with that sentiment enough that he doesn't argue or counter it. ]
...there's a reason I asked the reapers if a person could volunteer to handle the erasure instead of letting it be random instead. I wanted to know if he'd at least get the option if he wanted to try and take it.
For sake of closure... I think it should refer to the volunteer.
Not everyone will want to, will sign up for something like this, but I think if someone I cared for was erased... I would rather have the opportunity than let it be decided randomly.
[ so, it's a fair thing to ask. they grow quiet again as they linger here beside him. ]
...I am worried for how it will affect Matsui afterwards though. I know Nahida and Rang Lee both will be there to keep an eye on him but.
I think if Matsui didn't get a choice in when Buzen would leave him, having a choice of what to do with the person responsible is the next best thing. Even if...all of us are worried about what this means for him once it's done.
[ everyone is not surprised at the idea that matsui might break himself after executing libby. smashcut to sunday when it happens in a whole other way. ]
...but if it's Rang and Nahida, maybe he'll be okay. They're good choices.
[ there are flickers of concern, frowning a bit deeply but. they do their best to give a small smile. their emotions trying to reel in- as though to reassure themselves it'll be fine. ]
The anticipation of not knowing is a bit stressing, huh.. I just have to trust that he will be able to manage in their care.
[ smashcut to Sunday indeed where all feelings are ouch and What The F]
There's...not much we can do until tomorrow. We're all going to be stressed until then, but we'll have to do our best to wait and make it until then. Trust that they'll be okay. All that.
...it's hard, but...what other choice do they have?
[ the choice of not going to watch, maybe. then that might have hurt less sunday. ]
We should just try to get some rest tonight and prepare for tomorrow.
[ not watching... Setsu would not blame any of them for doing so. but, Setsu who has gone and lived through so many loops, they feel like they owe it to any of them to watch and remember them. no matter how grim it may end up. so far the previous two weeks have ended generally the same fashion... what else could happen? (everything, im in tears) ]
Right. Good idea. [ they stay quiet for a moment, peering up at bit after. ] Are you gonna stay up here a bit longer? I can give you some space if you need it.
But, if you don't mind, I'd like to stay up here a bit longer. [ with him, if he doesn't mind. take in the view of the sky a bit longer before trekking to sleep. but they'll prioritize his need for space of course. either way, wraps this thread up baby!!! ]
[ he doesn't comment on limited choices. instead, he seems to be thinking some things to himself, not quite willing to voice everything out loud. but he does pause and he nods gently. ]
...we can stay for a little longer.
[ "we", because he doesn't mind. he knows setsu doesn't expect anything from him right now, and it's what he can handle at the moment as we set this thread free. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
But it's another instance of someone who probably didn't want to do it. Feels like a cheap victory, a little? [ it's complicated is what it is, because he'd liked buzen enough. ]
no subject
Mmm... I think if it was because of any of the reasons that were mentioned, maybe it wouldn't feel this way. [ hearing libby say it wasn't any of those... it really is complicated. they lean a little to the side to plop their head against him, glancing down with a frown. tired. ] If it had been anyone else too, I just...
[ a quiet, frustrated noise. of course that distant hurt comes through, because they did like Buzen. some of their recent decisions was made because of his advice and now he's just... gone. first Rin, now Buzen. it's just been a rough back to back. ]
no subject
It was a bad combination of stuff. It was a combination of someone else that was liked and a reason only Libby and maybe Buzen really know. It's hard to be mad when it was obvious she didn't mean for it to be as bad.
But it's also hard not to tell people they can still be upset.
no subject
It may have been kinder on others to have lied and said it was with the intentions of pushing their team ahead or to wipe out another's.
[ which is maybe pragmatic to say but. their eye closes, their emotions evening out to settle their thoughts in a way they're accustomed to. ]
It does make things overall complicated. And then when you try to consider what may happen tomorrow... [ mmm. bad. ]
no subject
[ there's a light frown. ]
Think it'll be Matsui in there?
no subject
[ where Buzen tried to, in his kind need to help the others, hint to everyone else. ]
...I think so. I can't imagine anyone else being put up there but. As we know, it can be unpredictable.
no subject
...there's a reason I asked the reapers if a person could volunteer to handle the erasure instead of letting it be random instead. I wanted to know if he'd at least get the option if he wanted to try and take it.
no subject
Not everyone will want to, will sign up for something like this, but I think if someone I cared for was erased... I would rather have the opportunity than let it be decided randomly.
[ so, it's a fair thing to ask. they grow quiet again as they linger here beside him. ]
...I am worried for how it will affect Matsui afterwards though. I know Nahida and Rang Lee both will be there to keep an eye on him but.
[ there's a small dread festering. ]
no subject
[ everyone is not surprised at the idea that matsui might break himself after executing libby. smashcut to sunday when it happens in a whole other way. ]
...but if it's Rang and Nahida, maybe he'll be okay. They're good choices.
no subject
[ there are flickers of concern, frowning a bit deeply but. they do their best to give a small smile. their emotions trying to reel in- as though to reassure themselves it'll be fine. ]
The anticipation of not knowing is a bit stressing, huh.. I just have to trust that he will be able to manage in their care.
[ smashcut to Sunday indeed where all feelings are ouch and What The F]
no subject
...it's hard, but...what other choice do they have?
[ the choice of not going to watch, maybe. then that might have hurt less sunday. ]
We should just try to get some rest tonight and prepare for tomorrow.
no subject
[ not watching... Setsu would not blame any of them for doing so. but, Setsu who has gone and lived through so many loops, they feel like they owe it to any of them to watch and remember them. no matter how grim it may end up. so far the previous two weeks have ended generally the same fashion... what else could happen? (everything, im in tears) ]
Right. Good idea. [ they stay quiet for a moment, peering up at bit after. ] Are you gonna stay up here a bit longer? I can give you some space if you need it.
But, if you don't mind, I'd like to stay up here a bit longer. [ with him, if he doesn't mind. take in the view of the sky a bit longer before trekking to sleep. but they'll prioritize his need for space of course. either way, wraps this thread up baby!!! ]
no subject
...we can stay for a little longer.
[ "we", because he doesn't mind. he knows setsu doesn't expect anything from him right now, and it's what he can handle at the moment as we set this thread free. ]